I Hate My Face (and What to Do If You Hate Yours)

Hey y’all!

I have been struggling a lot with my self-esteem ever since I was a kid. I’ve come a long way but I still struggle with it. I’ve always hated what I saw when I looked in the mirror. I’m going to do another post on beauty standards for the 21st century. When I was growing up, I was never considered beautiful and never really got male attention. Needless to say, I grew feeling (and still currently feeling) ugly. I remember when I was little, there was this show called “The Swan” in which they gave people who were unsatisfied with that they looked like, plastic surgery. I mean they had stories that tugged at the heart so it was beautiful to see how it changed their lives. Me? I wanted in (and if they bring it back, I’m signing up first thing).

There was a point in my life, where I avoided cameras. I just hated my face. I personally feel like that’s a huge factor in why I never had a boyfriend. I never really had male attention, even now. Guys barely liked my profile on dating sites and pretty much most of the guys that I liked, never liked me back, in real life and online. At this point, I just want to hide. I want to never take pics ever again. Trust, if I can afford it, I’m getting work done on my face and body. I want to go back to the days of not having any pictures of me. I hate how I look. I don’t look like most of the girls online and my voice is really high.

I know there are those out there who says looks don’t matter but let us not pretend that there’s pretty privilege. What’s pretty privilege you may ask? Well it’s the association of beauty with talent, intelligence, social success, and health. People who look attractive are given more advantages in life and in death. Yes, you read that correctly: death. People who are more attractive are more likely to get sympathy or even more coverage on her untimely passing versus those who are less attractive.

When it comes to seeking employment, in 2006, a study was done once in which it was found 10.5% of employees who were attractive had a higher salary. I’m sure that number is higher over 10 years later. Another study, done in 2017, found that more attractive students got better grades. There’s an interesting article from Insider on this and it too has scientific evidence. It goes into more details and I don’t want this post to be too long (I’ll tackle this topic again in a future post in the near future).

Clearly, if you have an appealing outer appearance and you’re seen as attractive according to today’s beauty standards (because they do change) your life will be a bit better than those who are less attractive. Those are facts. Now I’m not saying that all attractive people are great people because there are plenty of them who are broken deep down inside and some who are just awful people when you get to know them. They may appear like they have it all on the outside but on the inside they’re hurting.

Anyway, while its obviously a problem for everyday life for sure, it’s really hindering my business. I’m already nervous about putting myself out there but if I want my brand to grow, I gotta put myself out there. Recently, one of the booktubers that I follow made a youtube video about how to start a booktube channel and I immediately got so excited but then I remembered, I’m hideous. I cant go on camera. See? It’s damaging to my business. As you may or may not know, I’ve actually started a booktube channel and I tried being more active on TikTok as well but I feel so ugly and I’m pretty sure other people are thinking it as well. See? Again, it’s hindering me and my business? How do I expect to grow if I’m scared to put my literal face out there!

So what can we do? I have scoured the web for tips (cause lord knows I need it) and here’s what I found:

I’m still unsure how to navigate these things online because well, I need to have a presence online if I want to grow my brand. I have to put myself out there and it is really hard when you’re ugly. It won’t happen overnight but I can’t keep hindering myself because of the fact that I hate how I look. If you’re in the same boat as me, I’m praying for ya!

It’s good to remember that God doesn’t care what we look like. In 1 Samuel 16:7 it says: “Man sees what appears to the eyes; but as for Jehovah, he sees what the heart is”

What advice or tips would you give to someone who’s ugly?

Photo by George Milton on Pexels.com

XOXO,

Nessa D.

One response to “I Hate My Face (and What to Do If You Hate Yours)”

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