Nessa D

Hey y’all!

Recently, I decided to slowing break out of my comfort zone and try new things. I’m starting small so that I’m not overwhelmed and I must say, it’s fun! I’m also proud of myself for it too! At this point, it’s now the new year and lots of people make new years resolutions. I’m kind of off of that and don’t really believe in them anymore. I prefer to make goals or to set an intention for the year. I feel like (this is just my opinion), it’s much less pressure to have goals and intentions than to have resolutions. Besides, why push something off until the new year when you legit have it in you to start now.

I was listening to The Skinny Confidential’s Him and Her podcast recently and they had a guest on the show that said something along the lines of “one day means never (as in you’re never going to do it) and soon means within 30 days” and you know what, he’s right. If we say “oh one day I’m gonna write a book” or “one day I’ll run a marathon”, its not really concrete and you’re probably will never get around to it (well maybe if you try hard). For me, goals are something that can be broken down. I recently did a goal planning sheet with my therapist in which I had to break down different goals (Social, Career, Personality, Family, Leisure, and Physical) into yearly plans: 5 year plan, 1 year plan, and 6 month plan) which was really helpful because for each goal I can see what steps I need to take to make that goal and it gets me thinking about which would be the best way of going about making it. By the way, attached to this post is the planning sheet if you’d like to plan out your goals as well.

By the way, you want to know what goals kind of get pushed to the side that I actually don’t hear a lot of people talk about (unless you’re a Jehovah’s Witness) are spiritual goals. Why is it important to set spiritual goals? Because you can draw closer to God, we show that we are grateful for him and for what he’s done for us, it shows the good things that you are doing for God, and it helps you make other decisions more easily. I never hear people talk about that and it’s not something I thought of much neither and towards the end of the year, I got to thinking about what my spiritual goals would be. One of my spiritual goals is to draw closer to God and to do more to talk about my spiritual journey and what I’m learning to others. I need to study the publications more and actually try to answer a question or offer to read a scripture at the Kingdom Hall. I also need to take more steps to live accordingly to the Bible (I struggle a lot with this).

Prior to planning out my goals at the end of the year, I started to do small things to break out of my comfort zone. For example, I’ve always wanted to learn how to twerk. I used to dance when I was little but I learned ballet and jazz and contemporary…not twerking. I cannot dance at all lol so I was really looking forward to it. I kept telling myself that one day I’ll get around to doing it but I legit never did so when I saw one of the Tone It Up community members offer a twerk class, I was all in (besides we’re still in quarantine so why not?). It’s a great way to build confidence I feel and there’s nothing wrong with that.

I felt so silly dancing. I thought people were going to judge me (thankfully that didn’t happen…at least to my knowledge). It was a small group of and I must say that I’m proud of all of us. On the first day of class, I felt so self-conscious. I legit told the instructor that I’m super stiff when I dance and she stopped and put on music and told us to just dance like no one is watching and be sexy with it. First of all, when I think of myself, I don’t think of the word sexy (I’m working on my confidence, don’t worry). I was petrified honestly like I just stood there (maybe I did a little two step) but that’s about it. By the end of even if I felt super silly, I did it! I never would’ve danced in front of anyone and now I feel a little better now that I scratched that off my bucket list. That was just a 8 week intro course and so I’m looking to get better. Maybe I should practice each week.

The other new thing that I started doing weekly is making new recipes. I told my friend that each week I want to cook a new dish. I don’t really cook and I love watching Food Network (Pioneer Woman, Diners Drive Ins and Dives, Barefoot Contessa, 30 Minute Meals). And as much as I watch that channel, I don’t cook much. I have soooo many cookbooks and again, I don’t really cook. So I told my bff that I was committed to cooking one new meal a week. So far, I been doing that and having a great time. There were some hits and misses but I’m enjoying it. Learning to cook is on my vision board (check out this post to read all about my vision board). Whenever I find a great recipe, I’m always super excited and again this is helping to build my confidence. These are great skills when it comes to entertaining and just plain old adulting. I feel bad that I wasn’t really paying attention to my grandpa when he would cook but at least I’m choosing to learn now and that’s all that matters.

What are some goals you’re working on? What is something you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t done yet? What are you waiting for? If anything, 2020 has taught us that life is entirely too short and we should take the time that we have to do the things we’ve always wanted to do! I’m saying YOLO and do things that are reckless but if it will help you grow as a person, then by all means do those things that are out of your comfort zone. It’s amazing how you’ll feel afterwards.

XOXO,

LolaDasher